Living in Obedience and Love
Sacred Sobriety: A Path for the Soul
When Loving God Feels Difficult
“And hereby we do know that we know him, if we keep his commandments.”
— 1 John 2:3 KJV
How do I love God when there have been seasons when I genuinely felt abandoned by Him? How do I learn to trust God when experience has taught me that depending upon someone else eventually leads to disappointment, betrayal, exhaustion, or being left alone? These are difficult questions, but they are also deeply human questions that many people walking through recovery carry quietly beneath the surface of their faith.
For some of us, learning to survive meant becoming fiercely independent because depending upon other people rarely seemed safe. We learned how to anticipate problems before they happened, keep everyone around us calm, meet other people’s needs, suppress our own emotions, and somehow keep moving even when we were falling apart internally. What looked like strength from the outside was often a survival strategy developed in environments where vulnerability seemed dangerous.
Others learned that love meant giving until we were completely drained. We became the rescuer, the fixer, the peacemaker, the person who answered the late-night phone call, covered another person’s consequences, loaned the money, absorbed the emotional chaos, and continually placed ourselves last. Eventually we began wondering why love always seemed to demand that we disappear.
These experiences inevitably influence the way we understand God. If people who claimed to love us repeatedly disappointed us, we may wonder whether God will ultimately do the same. If authority figures were harsh or controlling, commandments may sound less like loving guidance and more like another demand being placed upon us.
This is why John’s words in 1 John 2:3–6 cannot be reduced to a simple command to behave better. John is describing what happens when fellowship with God becomes genuine enough to begin reshaping our lives. Knowing God moves from information into relationship, and relationship gradually begins changing how we think, respond, love, forgive, establish boundaries, surrender, and live.
For those walking a path of recovery, this passage speaks directly to the movement from surviving toward thriving. God is not merely asking us to stop doing destructive things; He is teaching us how to live differently because we are learning who He is, who we are in relationship with Him, and what healthy love actually looks like. Obedience therefore becomes less about religious performance and more about learning to walk with Christ one faithful step at a time.
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